Wednesday, March 13, 2019
Cinderella is a Liar!! (this blog is not about food and be prepared for adult content and bad language it is f'ing reality folks)
Cinderella is a liar. I, like countless women throughout the
world, were raised on the fairytale love story of Cinderella. Therefore, I have
spent my entire life dropping shoes at random locations waiting for my Prince
Charming. And let me just tell you this whole glass slipper process is the easy
part, it is maintaining the happily ever after which is where I feel like a
victim of fairytale fraud.
Relationships are just straight up hard work and anyone who
tells you something different is either lying to you or themselves or they have
a less than conscientious love. In my experience Prince Charming doesn’t just
rush me off to the castle in the clouds, he has led me either to divorce court
or a counselors office. The reality of relationships is that they are 75%
hardwork and 25% fun. Let me share with you what I have learned.
1.
Complacency is the fastest thing to kill a
relationship. You just don’t have the option of turning into a pumpkin and
letting life pass you by.
2.
Cinderella looks sweet and innocent, but
sometimes she just has to be a whore. In order to keep the relationship
inspiring there needs to be some spice in life and if it is not maintained in a
controlled environment, life will create it for you.
3.
Cinderella and Prince Charming were never even
shown exchanging more than 2 words and that is just not the way to a fairytale
love. Communication is truly the key and it never stops. The process of getting
to know that handsome love next to you truly never stops.
4.
No matter how amazing your prince is you still
need to put in the work because at the end of the day you fell in love with a
human. And there is no human that is perfect, only the human that is perfect
for you, and even those come with work.
5.
The birds and mice do not clean our houses and
so those everyday tasks of cleaning the house, raising children, working and
trying to maintain a social life takes its toll on the relationship. It makes
the relationship mundane and boring if you let it.
6.
The story of Cinderella was a story based on a
moment in time and for all I know Cinderella also ended up single and drinking
wine with the girls. But all joking aside I feel like sometimes people come into
our lives for a season and just because there is a ring on your finger or a
glass slipper on your foot, they might not be your happily ever after forever
and we shouldn’t play small in keep people in our lives who don’t want to grow
with us. She could be on Prince Charming III by now or a lesbian, hell it is
2019!
7.
Cinderella heard that clock strike midnight and
she straight up fucking ran. That is a story I know way too well. I spent
countless years running from myself, running from emotions and running from
men. Let me tell you that sometimes we need to stop running and face the music because
the only way to truly get to the level of intimacy and connection that we all
crave, with ourselves and others, is stop and deal with our shit. And let me
tell you, from someone who is a recovering sprinter, standing and fighting is a
hell of a lot less fun.
8.
Cinderella made all of the little girls of my
generation grow up believing that a happily ever after can’t be achieved
without a horse drawn carriage, a tall, dark and handsome man and some rocking
shoes. But let me tell you, I have one out of three, the shoes. And I have a
pretty damn amazing life, complete with a successful career, amazing friends
and family and some crazy awesome adventures throughout this incredible world.
9.
Cinderella demonized the step-family. Well,
there Little Miss Fairytale, the reality is that there are a hell of a lot more
step-families today and coming from experience, getting to be a part of a childs
life, whether they are biologically yours or not is an incredible gift. And I can
tell you that I miss those girls a hell of a lot more than I have ever missed
their father. They truly were two of the most precious gifts in my life and I am
so blessed that I had the time with them that I did. So
10.
Cinderella also showed all of the little girls
of my generation that we should keep our mouths shut, our legs crossed, and
play small just cleaning the house and singing with the birds. Well, I am here
to set this one straight! This is absolute bullshit! Ladies, speak your truth,
sleep with the men you want to sleep with and go big or go home!! Cinderella
was a liar!!
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I just reread this and totally agree. I’m recently married and have never been happier. That said, the two years we dated before marriage were hell in wheels. On and off again was our motto. Who knew that marriage would cause us to behave with each other? It might change but for now we’re good.
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