I was 19 when I made the choice.

It was a choice then, and it was a choice now  that I don't take lightly.

It was the right choice for me, although it is the most personal choice a woman can make.

It is a choice I think of often,  every year on February 17th. 

It is a choice that has shaped many of my life choices.

It was a choice, and still is a choice, that I am grateful I had as an option.

I made the choice not because I was a victim of trauma, sexual assault, rape, or incest.

It was MY choice and MY choice alone.

It is a choice that has impacted my relationships, ended my marriage, and made me decide not to have a family of my own.

It is a a choice that when my ex-husband told me he wanted I family I knew I couldn't give him one, not because of physical limitations, but because I had a child already....a child I would never forget.

For me, at the time, it was the only choice I had. 

I drove to another town far away to avoid the shame and watchful eyes of my small hometown. 

I sat in that doctors office and promised myself I would not bring a child into this world until I could know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the child would be wanted more than life itself. I do not have biological children.

I cried, staring at the car window on the drive home, with my arms around my stomach, feeling as if something was missing.

It is a choice that deals with my body and my body alone. 

It is a choice that in my opinion does not belong in the hands of others - not my God, my government, my family, or my society. 

It is a choice I believe in.

It is a choice that has impacted so many women I know.

It is a choice we often don't talk about.

It is a choice that we often hide due to shame, fear, embarrassment, judgment, and self-loathing.

If it was not your choice, or the choice you believe in, I respect that without question.

It is not the right choice for everyone, but it was the right choice for me.